All posts by Samantha

Cello, chocolate, transit and tofu

The past 3 days have been fantastic. It started with pancakes and worked out beautifully. Lots of food, adventure, reading, music, friends and bliss.

The bus driver and I are already like old friends — “Folks, we’re taking a short detour and will be back on track in a moment.” Me: Where the heck are we going?! A few corners at high-speed later and we practically skid into my new driveway. Day made 🙂

My room is clean and it is mine. I went adventuring and it made me smile. You can’t beat an eternally sustainable mug of hot chocolate, cozy to perfection with classic lit on the waterfront on a sun-filled holiday. You just can’t.

“That’s definitely tofu. But it’s tasty. But wait, it’s not tofu. It’s fish on a stick. But it tastes like tofu?” ROFL 😀 And the adventure continues… “Let’s go that way” I say, and half an hour later we’re in the middle of nowhere and Em says, “Are you trying to kill me?” hauling herself up the hill to a view to nowhere. But it’s sunny and we both have a sense of humour and so nothing is lost, except us. We are lost. In the end, we found our bearings, and Guinness and ice-cream, too!

I did sun salutations with the sun on my face and the briefest of audiences with a teensy hummingbird who was just as curious about me as I was about him 🙂

Feeling all the best bits of well-rounded in this calm after the whirlwind of the recent past and before the fast-paced future that is just around the corner.

–Sam

 

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Benevolent Chaos 4.0

Day 2/Week 1:

Today is Wednesday.

We’ve been in the new office space all together (BB) for 2 days. I’m already in love. It is so great to have everyone under 1 roof again, to have a space for supplies and my own private office. The team is back in the double digits and multi-lingual, chock full of amazing people, as I’ve mentioned before. Still ironing out the details.

I’ve been in my new home for 1 week. It is going well. Still ironing out the details.

I am amazed every day. I’m grateful for a place to sit and a place to sleep, that laundry has never been easier to do and that taking a shower is so simple and restorative. Time has been bending and I have never had such difficulty in determining the day of the week until recently. I’m glad I’m not the only one, that there are people who understand and can laugh with me about it and cobble together impromptu chocolate breaks.

Everything, everywhere is still in pieces, but at least all the pieces are (mostly) in one spot 🙂 It has been and is a blur.

The weekend is near and I’m ecstatic.

I need an empty day to tackle my room and confer with my housemate and put a few more pieces into place. Right now, finding my glasses and keys and knowing for certain that it is February 7th (Only?! Already?!) is about all I can handle.

Thank you for your patience and warmth. If there’s not much visible now, and not too many signs of life, just know that I’m ok and there’s a whole lot happening behind the scenes.

All the best,

Sam

Benevolent chaos 3.0

There’s a picture on our fridge at home of one of the first, if not the first time we went to the PNE. If you’re having a bad day, all you have to do is look at that picture and the bad feeling is suddenly not so bad. We are on the old wooden roller coaster, terrified and travelling at high speed to say the least. It grows on you after a few tries, but you wouldn’t know it to look at the kids’ faces in this photo.

The feeling I have today, and the feeling I’ve had for weeks now is very close to how I experienced that introductory ride: terrified, traveling at high speeds, stomach-dropping, jaw-clenching, knuckle-whitening, face-altering, gravity-fuelled, I really hope this seatbelt works kind of exhilaration and breathlessness that leaves you stunned for a moment afterwards before you decide that, yes, that was…fun, and you feel ready almost for another go.

I’ve switched gears, jumped wave-lengths, pondered much and packed and unpacked a ridiculous amount of boxes. Today has not been quite the warm and fuzzy kind of day I was banking on, I feel pretty woozy. But, for the moment, everything that needs doing is done, and I feel I’ve done pretty well.

Find you stride, keep your eyes open, time is fleeting.       –S. Riesco

scraping by

What a week!!!

Jan 24th I felt ill. Went home early. Slept for 14hrs. Felt better.

Jan 25th was hectic (I have no memory of it actually).

Jan 26th was awfully long but worth it because in the end I got to spend some quality time with my sibs.

Jan 27th was moving day with a mushroom burger and milkshake. Best part was staying warm and dry and the mushroom burger with fries.

Jan 28th Blackfish Nacho’s and shared birthday celebrations.

Jan 29th boxing the office. Box total: 26.

Jan 30th Survivor: Riesco edition 2.0. I do have a toothbrush, and shoes… But that’s about it #hindsightis2020 #temporarypermanence

Jan 31st Fingers crossed the final steps are smooth ones, because this pace is getting ridiculous.

So, now that’s 7-in-1.

Until next time,

–Sam

Benevolent Chaos 2.0

My head feels like it’s going to explode.

There is only so much one can do by one’s self in a day and I have done everything that I possibly can and still remembered to eat real food and brush my teeth — which deserves kudos. I know there is an analogy where if your brain is a computer all the tabs open in the browser of your choice are the thoughts top of mind. Right now, I have so many freakin’ tabs open that a system crash is imminent.

It’s all good stuff, but it’s getting to be too much.

That’s all I have the energy to say right now.

More later,

–Sam

Making all the difference

Some of the good things that happened today…

  • Didn’t have to wake up early; it was not a requirement.
  • Have the cold beat: “Thag you berry buch” (The Hobbit)
  • Ate chocolate with pretzels, and chai tea at the quirky cafe down the street and watched the rain fall.
  • Bought groceries and was surprised to find my bag emptied and re-packed neatly by the cashier, treating everyone with a genuine warmth and ease that is so hard to see sometimes — it made my day.
  • I managed one load of laundry and one of recycling.
  • Made it to the bank, changed some change and left feeling so wonderfully featherlight. No idea how I lasted that long!
  • All of my books are sorted, and my “Documents” are coming close to being in a similar state also.
  • I wanted granola and milk. I bought granola and milk; and I ate it and it was fantastic!
  • Talked with Rube and planned an adventure, unencumbered.
  • Cut my nails, stayed dry and halfway calm for at least 48hrs.
  • Caught up with friends; it was the best.
  • New favourite song on repeat

Tomorrow holds many possibilities,

–Sam

Mythic proportions

On how surprising it can sometimes be to get to know someone you know of or thought you knew: The mind boggles.

There are people I barely recognize and people who seem to remain always steadfast and warm-hearted. My own siblings are chock full of surprises, and myself, I catch glimpses of me wearing different hats and have to take a second look.

Ultimately, I find it beautiful, how people’s brains work, how they see and shape the world. All the differences and similarities, viewpoints and considerations. I feel privileged to be a part of it.

I was called a Neat Freak (in the manner of an endearment) the other day. My space needs to be organized — if that means all the junk on the right and all the clean laundry on the left, that works for me, though I do like to get a bit more involved 🙂 I aim for a feeling of lived-in and loved and livable.

There is definitely an energy to everything, especially places and people and lately, that’s having quite an impact on me both personally and at work.

I love my home. It brings me happiness to wake up in the space that is mine each morning and come back to it each night. Still, I want a change. The time is ripe, and it feels right. I’m excited to see how big I can make small feel, to try something new, explore the community and discover new people and places.

There is no universal normal, but I think there is power and value in local consensus and knowledge — that and the ideas of a life well-lived and well-loved.

sunrise-1004260_640

Echoes I

I’m not quite sure where the day went to be honest! I’m wary and weary but still adding miles to the road 🙂 I’m struggling with not having anyone present to banter with but myself, and also finding containers for all my worldly goods at the home and office.

Everything is echoing back and I’m surprised I’m not more disoriented, which isn’t to say I won’t be thrilled the day my world finally stands still for moment a few weeks from now and I have the chance to renew and reassess, and maybe even get a little bored!

I’d love some great conversation and a hug, but now I have to go make dinner and a cup of tea.